Posts tagged with "text"

I can’t wait to get my nipples re-pierced. I think I want rings this time.

grrrlfever:

Cosmo sex tip #394: Once your man reaches orgasm, awkwardly embrace him and whisper “well done Draco.”

(via bitter-blossom)

I didn’t realize how difficult it would be to see Jaime without his hand. Or to watch them torture Theon.

Is it bad that I’ve never made love? No, I never did it. But I sure know how to fuck. I’ll be your bad girl. I’ll prove it to you. I can’t promise that I’ll be good to you because I’ve had some issues. I won’t commit. No, not having it. But at least I can admit that I’ll be bad, no, to you. Yeah, I’ll be good in bed, but I’ll be bad to you.

I have decided, I want a Coton de Tulear, a Japanese Chin, a Maltese, or a Mi Ki. 

aquus:

before you have sex with me you have to earn it

take these two potatoes and this goat and bring them to the river valley where you will meet an old gypsy named madam zeroni. carry madam zeroni back up the mountain on your back and allow her to drink from the stream while you sing for her. she will give you a necklace of beads. return them to me to complete the quest.

(via tomhiddlestno)

  • blue ivy, age 12: mom, can you help me solve this equation
  • beyonce: i don't know much about algebra, but i know one plus one equals two
  • blue ivy: mom i am failing

swanqueendreams:

Raise your hand if you have ever been personally victimized by George R. R. Martin.

teenagesophiebennett:

you know parents make such a big deal about explaining homosexuality to their children but when I was a kid I watched a show where one of the villains was a satanic cross-dressing lobster and never once questioned it

image

(via cockyvonmurderous)

why can’t plane tickets be like 10 dollars

why can’t concert tickets be like 10 dollars

why can’t everything be like 10 dollars

I’m not paying 10 dollars for a candy bar fuck you

(Source: superhighschoollevelhope-archive, via dondaario)

italktosnakes:

icantdotheonesteptwostep:

shouldertappingghosts:

haiirflip:

today a guy confirmed that at boy sleepovers they do in fact talk about girls and who they like a good majority of the time i just thought this would be useful information

Why does this have so many notes? What did you think we do at sleepovers? Meth? Animal sacrifice?

Well thats what girls do

Great, now everyone knows. 

(via bruhyouknowyoudaillest)

A guy told me one time, “Don’t let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner.”

  • Me at 7 AM: tired
  • Me at 12 PM: tired
  • Me at 3 PM: tired
  • Me at 7 PM: *yawn* tired
  • Me at 10 PM: tired
  • Me at 2 AM: TIME TO REDECORATE MY ENTIRE ROOM

chatoyantmoon:

i have a lot of homework, so i’ve decided to start watching a new tv series

(via for-shits-and-hiddles)

Ugh, the Beautiful Creatures movie is going to be awful. The actors are so wrong. Nooo -_-